The highly successful narcissist appears to be a very confident, self entitled, self assured individual. Often he is socially adept and can be very persuasive. He has a special way of drawing people to him. This is the mask that he (or she) presents so convincingly to the world. Often his audience responds with the praise, adulation and monetary rewards that the narcissist strongly pursues to prove how perfect and powerful he is.

Pro Clinical

There is a dark underside to the narcissistic personality that shows itself when he is crossed, when people don't meet his unreasonable demands. Beneath the surface of his attractive outer shell, the narcissist is always seething. Narcissistic rage begins in early childhood. One classic theme is that of a parent or parents who focus on creating a perfect child. Rather than allow the child to be his natural spontaneous self, they impose a false self on him. They give him the impression that he is superior to others, that he can do no wrong, that he can treat others without respect, and that there are no consequences to his destructive and cruel behavior. At the base of the narcissistic rage is the unconscious feeling that he was never loved for being himself, but simply for the attributes that his parents saw in him: physical attractiveness, intellectual capacity, athletic prowess, artistic talent. He has been exploited by his parents to make them feel more powerful and worthy.

The unconscious source of narcissistic rage is self loathing. When the narcissist fumes like Vesuvius and smoke becomes explosive flames, the molten lava of his bottomless rage covers everything in its path. There are several ways to protect yourself from narcissistic rage. First, learn to identify the narcissistic personalities in your life. Second, maintain respect for yourself and make the discrimination that you are a separate unique individual from the narcissist (even if you are married to one). Third, be clearly aware that the fulminating narcissist is using a defense mechanism called projection. He cannot contain the horrible way that he feels about himself, so he projects this venom on to others, especially those close to him Always remember, it's not about you. Remain empowered, stay as calm as you can and maintain an emotional distance and psychological grounding in the truth.

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The narcissist (especially high-level narcissists who are very successful in the world) is very adept
at fake empathy or what can be called pseudo empathy. The socially gifted narcissist is an expert at convincing others that he/she cares deeply about them. "Pseudo empathy is exquisitely designed by the narcissist to manipulate others so they will fulfill his narcissistic needs."

Pro Clinical

The narcissist is always mentally circling his world to find ways that he can re-supply his narcissistic needs for money, power, adulation, praise, even veneration. He is looking for others who will fulfill his worldly goals. He seeks bright, motivated people to whom he can delegate most of the work and then turn around and take the credit for himself. In his personal life, the narcissist finds partners who enhance his image of perfection, self-entitlement, and ultimate power. These individuals are emotionally pliable and attracted to him.

The narcissist ensnares others by appealing to their narcissistic needs to be wanted, cared for, to feel valuable, attractive and powerful. When a narcissist is turning on the spigot of his well practiced fake empathy, the unsuspecting victim feels singled out as a very special person who is prized and indispensable (often for the first time in his life).

Many followers of the narcissist never wake up. They continue to be selfless servants, unable to separate themselves psychologically from him. Many of those who do become aware of the price they are paying (giving up their own lives) make the Faustian bargain and decide that the lifestyle and perks connected with being a part of the narcissist's charmed circle and entourage are worth it.

Those who are ready to free themselves from the narcissist's pseudo empathy and the powerful pull of his promises can free themselves through these steps:
1. Identify what the narcissist really wants from you (24/7 availability to work non-stop, sexual favors,
the highjacking of your creativity for his own venal purposes.
2. Practice positive self talk. Be kind with yourself. Recognize that your life has its own special meaning without the narcissist.
3. Count your special gifts. Write down how you will use them in this new life cycle.
4. Practice emotional independence, beginning with small steps.
5. Seek solid professional help (if necessary) in severing your relationship with the narcissist in your private or professional life.
6. Verbalize your appreciation to yourself for the courage, strength and action it take to remove yourself from the narcissist's fake empathy, psychological snares, and tempting empty promises.

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